Blonde By Design

Friday, June 30, 2006


Puppy Training Class at PetSmart
- $99

Required treats for class
- $ 9.99

New stuffed puppy to play with
- $11.99

Obeying sit and down commands in front of entire class on first try... Priceless!!!

For Excitement in the Neighborhood...















For excitement in the neighborhood, a lovely drunk driver missed the corner (we think but aren't sure), ran over the lawn and landscaping, and kissed the cement wall with his car.

The nimwit had 2 children in the car with him.

Luckily no one was hurt, but I have a feeling this guy is going to be ... behind bars (steel ones - the alcohol free type.) for quite a while.

Poor dude... but... he deserves it!
















Thursday, June 29, 2006


I saw this Ellen Tracy purse in all white at Macy's and it was love at first sight.

Until I looked at the price. $368.00



Or should I say YIKES??

Because I want it.

But, I can't justify buying a white purse for that much money that I'll only be able to use for 2 more months of the summer. (I don't like it in the other colors as well and I can't find the white one online for a good buy!)

Since I'm being practical you might ask, "what's the problem?"

"I dream about it!"

*sighs*

Saturday, June 24, 2006


Like all men, I loves me a trip to Home Depot.




Man, would you look at that line?



Someone save me, she's going back in for more flowers!!


Friday, June 23, 2006

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 Posted by Picasa

I had a completely different post planned for today then what I've decided to do. After a brief tour outside this morning, to do morning potty duty with the Ark Family (2 dogs and kitty that follows), I've decided I should post my spring pictures before it's so hot outside that they actually melt on my disk.

Today is one of those bad air days I was telling you about. On top of the bad air we have a heat advisory warning. (107-110 projected heat) If I didn't have physical therapy (I was injured in a car accident the 16th of Dec. *sighs* and am still dancing with the physical therapist) I'd load up the Ark and head for the coast or anywhere that wasn't on a health advisory warning status.
So, being the sensible blonde that I am, I've decided to trick my brain back to Spring time.





Thursday, June 22, 2006

Does anything look out of place in this bathroom drawer???
I looked for it for an HOUR last night and couldn't figure out what the heck I did with it! I always put it back in the same place. Finally, I gave up and learned how to turn the TV off the old fashioned way.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Nabbed from a friend who nabbed it from a friend... (which means I stole it. *grins* )

I am: totally grateful.
I Want: to be better than I am.
I Hate: dishonesty.
I Love: easily and unconditionally.... (hey! This doesn't mean I want to marry you!! *blink, blink*)

I Miss: unexpected morning wake up calls, long talks with Jo over baked apples drizzled with caramel sauce, getting lost for hours in creating artsy things, and the comfort of close friends.

I Fear: not getting enough rest.
I Hear: the voice of a warm memory that echoes in my mind.
I Wonder: how I survived so much.
I Regret: not catching on sooner.

I Am Not: always riding the Short Bus. Sometimes I drive it.
I Dance: to my reflection in the window, my body absorbing the music.
I Sing: quietly when I think no one is listening.
I'm Not Always: right.

I Make With My Hands: loving gestures, artistic creations, and pots of flowers in my garden.
I Write: how I feel, sometimes in disguise, but not necessarily well.
I Confuse: words in my head. (dyslexia... esp. when fatigued)
I Need: to receive comfort and nurturing once in a while.
I Should: plan my meals.
I Start: the day over when ever I need to.
I Finish: all of my desert.

Arghhhhhh.. I'm having blogger issues and it keeps giving me html error messages and won't publish my blog. I'm not supposed to have bad air days AND bad blog days ALL on the same day!! *goes off to pretend I'm pouting*

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Warning... Blonde Air Alert...

It's a bad air day here, in sunny California.

It's the kind of air day that makes breathing difficult, thinking an impossibility and blocks out all sensibilities, like the simple fact that, "Really, there is oxygen on the universe... some where, little Jimmy. Just not here." It leaves you with one functioning brain cell, if you're lucky!

It's the kind of day that makes me grateful I'm a blonde.

At least *I'll* have an excuse for all the stupid things I'll say and do.

*grins*

(ummm... if you're one of those people that bad air quality days does not affect... then, ummm... "We're not talking! I can't come out and play today!") *grins and winks*

Sunday, June 18, 2006

Soccer Ain't for Sissy's...

Yesterday, while working out at the gym, the TV was set to the World's Cup Soccer match (or something close to that).

U.S.A. vrs. Italy.

What a great game! I'm still feeling a little (lot) of empathy for the poor guy that got kicked so close to his unmentionables that I almost called to volunteer to hold his ice pack. *blink, blink, blonde look*

I've not watched much soccer before, although I did catch the women's games during the Olympics years ago. Great team. I've never been a big tv sports fan. I like to see the game live, in action... in my face. Once in a while, though, a game will catch my eye. Now, I know this may seem boring to you, but I don't really care who wins or loses. (although I do plan on picking teams to follow on a regular basis... some time in the... whenever I do time. *grins*)

I'm totally in to all the great moves, passes, plays, offense and totally, especially defense. I LOVE the mechanics of the game, regardless of what sport it is. LalalaLoveeeee it.

Who knew the U.S.A. men's soccer team was full of so many hotties??? Tall, dark and handsome, just the way I like 'em. No shoulder pads, or any other pad/pads to block the view. O-M-G! I so *did* appreciate the view, I did an extra 10 minutes on the bike just so I could watch more of the game.

*laughs at self*

So out of character for my blonde self.

So, like, for a whole 20 minutes I was a female chauvinist oinker! And please don't ask me who won the game.

I haven't a clue....

My Bratty Confesion...

I live in a fairly nice gated community. To get inside of the complex (now that the gates are finally working... again), one must key in their code at the call box outside of the gates. After the correct code is submitted, the electronic man voice, sounding much like a stiff butler, comes on over the loud speaker and says, "Please Enter."

Today, as I was pulling up to our complex, I noticed the vehicle ahead of me was one of the owners/developers. Not a man I'd rate well, on a scale of one to ten, of human beings that deserve to breath.

Ok, ok, maybe he deserves to breath, but I'm sure God, himself, has questioned this. He's not a nice man. I mean, REALLY not a nice man. Better known by many as a pyro type of guy that's probably tipped the scales on a little insurance fraud, not to mention the rest of his shady reputation and lack of honor in his business deals with many. Mostly, though, he just doesn't treat people well or fairly, and tends to lie more than your average liar finds necessary.

I understand that Mr. Pyro thinks I should be impressed because he has money.
I just keep forgetting. *blink, blink, blonde look*

My car idles quietly as I watch Mr. Pyro fumble with his code to enter the complex so he can do his little *criticize the world and everyone in the complex* drive through, then berate the manager for everything he thinks she hasn't done right. He's all ready fired one set of managers since I've been here. He'd criticize an ant in a driveway if he saw one. Probably teed his wife off.... again, so the home life may be a little dramatic and he's looking for a place to vent.

He's busy smoking a stump of a cigar with both windows rolled down on his truck while smoke drifts out and mixes in with the sticky hot, pollutant air. He fumbles with the codes longer than normal on the callbox, almost drops his cigar, then tries his code again. It's obvious he's having trouble with his code or forgotten it. It's not like he uses it often, but what little he does use is wayyyyyy to often for anyone that lives here.

I sit patiently behind him, examining my new orangish-pink summer nail polish, waiting for Mr. Pyro to either open the gate or move out of the way. He's about to swear at the callbox, looks like he wants to hit it, and truly appears to not be looking his best today. Perhaps he had too long of a conversation with his favorite brandy bottle last night, adding to his foul mood. I hadn't noticed last time I saw him that his hair was thinning so much, as I watch the slight breeze catch his combover and tease it out of place.

Glancing behind him he sees me sitting there and I watch as his shoulders relax, exhaling a sigh of relief. He recognizes me and knows I can open the gate.

And then, all of a sudden, I got hit by a lightening bolt with the kind of Divine Inspiration only a True Blonde can have.

As Mr. Pyro pulls forward and starts to drive around the culdesac circle at the front entrance, so he can pull his truck up behind me, freeing me to move forward, key in my code and open the gate, I followed him around the circle of the culdesac, trying hard not to grin , then casually drove off, waving a cheery *hello,* giving him my best blonde look as I left.

*tries not to giggle*

You should have seen the shocked, question mark look on his face.

And there he was, again, battling with his code in the callbox, trying to enter through the gates.

Me? I grinned all the way down the block trying to figure out where I should drive to while Mr. Pyro was inspecting the complex after he finally figured out how to key his code in correctly.

Monday there will probably be some complaint about me, but it won't be too bad. I was wearing a low cut cami that showed my tan and cleavage to it's best advantage when I dissed him. He noticed that more than my contempt for what a lousy person he is.

And that is my bratty moment confession for ... the month. *grins*



Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Summing up a crazy day...


Today my puppy almost ate a condom,
I almost had a headon collision while
driving to a neighboring city to pick up a prescription
(an oncoming car passing dangerously on a cut across country road),
the prescription wasn't filled because it's refill date expired the first of June and the doctor's office hadn't called back,
I almost got nabbed for speeding by a cop on my way home
(yay for being blonde),
I got a rug burn on my elbow at physical therapy that involved nothing fun. ( I lost my balance and fell off the big green workout ball
. ...well, ball and rug burn is a... Thought.).
My physical therapist thinks my neck fatigues easily because the rest of my body is in such great shape that it can't keep up with me.
(*frowns*.. and that's supposed to make me feel better?),
One of my least favorite clients whined her way in to over time
(which she has done for the past year).
When I informed her that she was over the scheduled time she'd paid for, she tried to argue that she thought it was for an hour *not* a half hour,
pushing *my* time schedule to the limit,
causing me to be late for and miss my 7:30 pm doctor appointment
with my favorite NP, John,
so the mole on my back that is itching and bleeding did
*not* get removed.

And the day's topper?
I had to spank my puppy and I feel like a REAL JERK.
Especially since he was only tearing up his potty pads because I didn't listen to the fact that he WANTED OUTSIDE.
He does *not* like to do number 2 in his space or on the pads.
I get the "Bad Mom of the Year" award.

Thank God tomorrow is a facial and nail nazi day!


Condom Eating Puppies

My morning walk with, Molly, The Wonder Dog, and, Cajun, The future Man-Eating Super Puppy, began in it's normal calm way, maneuvering Cajun, The Super Puppy, out of Molly's path so she wouldn't threaten to eat him before they'd finished their walk and had breakfast.

Puppies, much like children can get into the least expected things within a blink of an eye. I'd only turned for a second to remind Molly, who can be trusted to walk without the lead of a leash, that, "No she could Not cross the street." When I turned back to see what the Super Puppy had gotten in to, I gawked and stood motionless... speechless, my stomach knotted up, looking for my inner calm, fighting the EEEEKKKKK reaction sitting in my throat.

There Cajun was, wiggling and playing, tugging at the end of his leash with a bright green condom casually hanging out of his mouth, looking at me with that cute, lop-sided, "See what I've got," grin of his.

Four Our Fathers and three Hail Mary's later, *Thank God*, Cajun dropped the condom when asked to let it go so I didn't have to touch the thing.

Ewwwwww. Now what do I do? Take him home and swab his little mouth out with alcohol? Ack. Ickyyy poooo. I am Sooooo grossed out!

And, worse, I live in a nice area. Or atleast I thought it was a nice area! (apparently someone's teenage daughter may be safe from an early pregnancy)

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

You know you are irreparably blonde when you, with confidence and great ease, repair your precious, professionally manicured summer pink fingernail....

.....and manage to glue your best pair of scissors permanently Shut!!

Tan-Fastic!

A couple of years ago, I decided I should try to give up my Sun Worshipping Ways. I was lucky I didn't look worse considering all I'd been through, and my thighs seemed to be sliding down my legs. (not a pretty sight) I wasn't sure if it was sun damage, a cause from thyroid issues, aging, or a result of many years of inactivity due to illness in prior years.

I'd struggled to find a product that would give me the beautiful golden brown color my skin naturally turned to during my former tanning bed and sun loving days. I'd tried many different and very expensive products that left me looking like I was some where between a cross of badly jaundiced or had hepatitis. Then there was the constant need for reapplication. I needed to reserve a couple of hours every day or so for reapplying the self tanner, which also meant running around the house sans clothing until the lotions were set and dry. It was a lot of work and time consuming just to keep a half ass summer glow.

I'd also discovered air brush tanning, which was way cool and took me to my deep, dark golden brown color, but that can get expensive. I didn't care though, it gave me a great tan, so I decided to work it into the budget. This year, however, after having Sunsational Tans *not* honor the 4 tanning sessions I had left from last year, I've chosen to boycott them! At $25 a tan, that is $100 they're stealing of my hard earned money!!

Lucky me, I've hit the Jackpot of self tanning secrets this summer! I had an Eureka! moment and accidentally discovered Salon Bronze. (my best discoveries are *so* always by accident) It's a very cool air brush tanning kit that you can do at home. It gives me as equally nice of tan as I got at the tanning salon, but for a fraction of the price! ($14.99) If there's a Sally's Beauty Supply near you, they have it on sale this week with a $5 dollar off coupon.

Here are a couple photos to show you.




These slight tan lines are 3 days old, after one application and several showers later.



I wanted a deeper tan, so I did another application and this is the result. (and no.. I under no circumstances wear a bikini in public any more!)

Saturday, June 10, 2006

Have you ever had a day where your head hurts so bad that you mentally struggle or go blank just to recognize simple grammar or words that are so familiar it's silly?

It's one of those *blank* days. *sighs* And it's not the peroxide.

Thanks to our lovely air quality my sinuses have officially left the country ....
... and taken my brain with them.